Anyone need anything built?

27 06 2008

I know it sounds a little odd.  I’ve been having the itch to build something ever since I started working for California Landscape and Design.  I have seen how the guys there start with bare dirt, and turn it into a dream backyard.  It’s quite impressive, and they make it look so easy.  Ever since I’ve had my house, I’ve really had the itch to build stuff out of wood.  My wife always hears, “Why would we buy that?  I can make it for half the price.”  For example, I just recently made a workbench for around $125.  Doesn’t sound too cheap though right.  When you consider you could probably park your car on it, and then fold up the legs and take it with you, that’s pretty amazing.  Now granted you kind of have to be a brute to carry it by yourself, but that’s just how I do things.  I’ve really had the craving to build Danielle and I a headboard for our bed, but I need a few more tools to really do it well.  That’s also been a problem.  In order to justify building something, it has to be very functional and look decent.  The functional I’ve got.  It’s the making it look decent that’s a little harder.  I know though, that the more things I build, the more knowledge and skill I acquire.  Besides, I never do things halfway.

So I have ideas to build an entertainment center, dog house with patio, elevated dog bed w/ storage for dog food and water, a head board for my bed, my office with shelves and desktop, a shed for my dad’s house to store all his tools/lawn mowers, etc.  I have tons of ideas, energy, problem solving skills, desire, and perserveerance to do all this stuff with no money to justify it.  So I’m putting out a call for anyone that would like some stuff built.  If you need something built out of masonry or wood let me know, I can do it. 

Brought to you by:

the next Tim “The toolman” Taylor

Chris the-soon-to-be-Toolman Barton….(and you thought Danger was my middle name.  Don’t you feel silly)


Back looking for a job. BOOOOO!!

27 06 2008

So I’ve finally conceded and realized that I’m not going to be able to make enough at California Pizza Kitchen to make it until December.  It sucks, and I was kind of hoping it would pick up, but with the economy the way it is, that’s not going to happen.  So I need to look for an additional job.  I’ve told California Pizza Kitchen (affectionately known as CPK) that I will be looking for another job, but they will still be my number one commitment because that’s what I told them I would do at the beginning my employment.  I’ve still got the same problem that I did when I started looking for a job the first time.  Nobody is hiring!  So what do I do?

I’ve been thinking about this for a while now, and I have a few dilemma’s.  First off, I have society telling me that I need to get a job and be the bread winner in the relationship.  I don’t blame anybody for thinking this way.  I just think that it is an old-fashioned frame of mind.  Now in some Christian sects, this is held onto firmly.  The bible does give the male the head of the household role.  Some people might think that means “the man needs to be the one bringing home the bacon for his family”.  I can understand why they think that.  I thought that was true for most of my life.  I’ve come to understand though that “head of the Household” is different than that.  To me it means that I need to be at the “Head of my Family” and take responsibility for the situations and predicaments we are in.  For example, if we are in money struggles and can’t pay the bills, I’m not going to ask my wife to get a second job.  I feel that that is my area of responsibility.  I need to provide in times of need.  I don’t need to bring the biggest paycheck home though.  If my wife and I are not doing so well spiritually or emotionally, I need to step up and own the fact that I am not providing a loving and nurturing environment for my wife and I.  I could just as easily blame it on my wife, but it is my responsibility to take the necessary steps to bring us to a healthy point in our relationship.  Wow, I got a little carried away with that one. 

Secondly, I don’t want to get locked into a career right now because Danielle and I have our hearts set on traveling when she is done with school.  I think she has to work for about a year or so in the field before she can get into traveling, but I want to be able to do that when we get there.  I do want to work though.  Let’s get that straight.  I am blogging alot lately because I don’t have very many shifts right now at CPK.  It sucks!  I need to work.  I will go stir crazy after too many hours of non-productivity.  So I need a job or maybe even two.  I’m defineately not opposed to taking a second job right now.  In fact I’m searching for one. 

So does anyone have any suggestions as to what might be the best areas to work in with this crappy economy that we are in?  Do I get another job in the Food Service industry?  Should I look at construction?  I can’t do medical, unless it’s janitorial services.  Which I’m not below doing if it’s worth my while.  Do I try to start up my Landscape Design Business again?  It’s so frustrating.

Don’t you hate it when…

26 06 2008

Here’s my latest battle.  I hate it when we go through some really hard times, then God makes His presence known to you, and comforts you, and you two chat it up all the time.  You know why I hate it?  It’s times like now for me that I desire to go through those hard times again.  When Danielle and I split up, God and I were best friends.  We would chat it up at work, in the bathroom, at home, on the way home, and everywhere else.  Now, I make time for video games, but not God.  I don’t even have any good games!!!Why?!?!?

Don’t answer that!  Of course I know why.  I don’t see my need and desire for that kind of relationship with Him.  I hate it.  I need someone constantly following me, demeaning me, telling me I’m worthless so that maybe, just maybe I’ll break down and cry out to God.  I feel like that puzzle that has all the pieces forced together in all the wrong spots.  Sure the pieces don’t move, they are tight, but they are in all the wrong places.  For some reason though, I’m think that if they don’t move and you can lift the dang thing up without it falling apart, than it’s right.  I am put together, but now I am truly in a bad spot. 

As far as I know, I have only three decisions.  I can be ok with the way I am eventhough I know that it’s not right, or I can cry out and say, “God, tear me apart and put me back together the right way!”  Now, that’s two choices I have.  There is one more.  This is my current prayer, “God, put me back together the right way, but piece by piece instead of all at once.”  Now I’m not quite sure if even that is selfish.  It seems that it is selfish to ask God to do it in my timing.  I know that in order to get my life back on track with God, I’m going to have to lose some things.

I’m going to have to lose my comfort for starters.  That is, afterall, my main problem standing between God and I.  If things in life are taking over my life, what do you think is the first thing God’s going to want.  Those precious “THINGS”.  I don’t even think that possessions are my problem.  It’s my time and energy.  I have plenty of both but I’m not willing to use those things for God.  That’s actually not entirely true.  I’m willing, but they need to be asked of me.  So tell me, does anybody need anything of me.  Not just labor or work, but does anybody need someone to bounce ideas off of?  Does anyone have problems that need solved or, for the ladies, do you have problems that you need to share, but don’t need solved?  Actually scratch that, I’m not very good at that one.  (In Seinfeld’s Tone) What is the deal with that!?  Who talks about a problem and doesn’t want it solved???  Wouldn’t that just be a thing??



Anyways, I don’t know how to fix this.  Yes, I do want it fixed, just as convienently for me as possible.  Is that too much to ask?

I can’t wait to have kids, and yet I can.

13 06 2008

At the marriage conference this past weekend, the topic of kids came up.  I have been having alot of contact with kids lately and I have been itching to talk to someone about this subject.  I have strong views on kids now.  I’ve seen what happens when you do not discipline them or stick together and to your word.  The expression “give them an inch, and they’ll take a mile” is now more real to me. 

Now granted, I don’t have kids so I don’t know what it’s all about, but I know some things that I will not allow or some things that I will always remember.  First off, your kids need to respect you and know who’s in charge.  If you’ve ever seen, “The Dog Whisperer”, a.k.a. Cesar Millan, he has some principals that he follows with dogs that I think are very applicable to kids as well.  For example, kids need discipline.  Not just to keep them in line, but it’s healthy for them.  In “The Dog Whisperer”, there was a german shephard that wasn’t behaving and Cesar told them that a german shephard is a working dog.  In order to feel that he has a purpose, this dog needed to be put to work and he needed discipline.  When he was put to work and not always allowed to do whatever it wanted, the german shephard shaped right up.  With the discipline, he felt that he had a purpose and he needed to follow the rules that his master had set up for him.  I believe strongly that kids need this as well.  Kids need to know that you, the parent, are the boss.  If you give them an inch of leeway, they will take it and stretch it as far as you let them.  You don’t always need to keep them under wraps, but if you tell them not to do something and they do it, you need to reprimand them however it seems appropriate.  You have to stick to it though, don’t tell them to sit in the corner for 3 minutes and let them get up after 30 seconds.  You’re letting them know that they are in control and that you aren’t.

An interesting diagram was shown at the conference.  It was a diagram of the timeline of a parents protection and preparation over time.  The older your kids get the less protection you should give them and the more preparation for life you should give them.  It’s like the Biodome in Tucson, they wondered why the trees weren’t growing as tall and strong as they should have been.  When they studied them, they came to the conclusion that the trees needed the wind to grow strong.  Without the wind blowing through trees forcing them to grow stronger in order to survive, they couldn’t grow to their full potential.  Same with kids, if you protect them all their life, they aren’t going to grow and mature into the person they are supposed to be.  Overprotective parents think that they are doing their kids a favor by keeping them out of danger.  They are going to need help with things, but as they get older, they need to do things on their own. 

Think about the person you want your child to be and start helping them get there.  When your kids are getting to the 16 year mark or so, start thinking about making them do more chores.  When they move out they are going to need to know how to do their laundry, make dinner, take care of the dishes, clean the house, mow the yard, change the oil and so forth.  If you haven’t taught them these things by the time they move out, how are they going to learn it?  Most of the time they bring this stuff back to you, because you’re the one that’s been doing it for them up till now.  I lived with 4 other guys in a house and immediately I could tell who had to do chores and who didn’t.  One of my buddies and I were always cleaning the house and mowing the yard while two others did absolutely nothing except destroy the place.  You know who you are.  It’s very apparent when people are on their own if they were taught to swim or relied on their parents to swim for them.  TEACH YOUR KIDS TO SWIM, OR THEY WILL DROWN WITHOUT YOU CARRYING THEM!

So you ask, why am I excited to have kids and yet I can wait.  I am excited to see how I do as a parent.  A little conceded and misdirected I think, but it’s the truth as of right now.  It’s a tough world kids have to deal with right now.  With drugs, alcohol, pornography, reality shows and lack of discipline, it’s amazing kids these days respect authority at all.  There is nothing wrong with spanking!!!  All of you who think it’s abuse, get over yourself!  There is a time to spank and a way to spank.  If you tell your child not to do something and they keep doing it, let them know if they do it again they will get a spanking, and when they do it, give them a firm spank on the butt.  It shouldn’t leave handprints or welts, but they should not want to get spanked agian.  It’s called discipline!!  My kids will be disciplined regardless of people telling me it’s child abuse.  Not disciplining your child is CHILD ABUSE!

Sorry, this is a long one, but it’s an hot topic for me.  Am I wrong?  Is spanking abuse?  Should kids and dogs never be compared to each other?  What are your thoughts?

Marriage Conference!

9 06 2008

So Danielle and I went to a marriage conference this weekend and it was awesome!  The conference we went to was from Family Life called “A Weekend To Remember”.  It was amazing.  I already said that.  I don’t know why I wrote my thoughts that don’t apply to my post.  I’m still doing it.  AHHHH!  Anyways, I will probably be writing alot more of the topics that really hit home for Danielle and I. 

Danielle and I swear by marital counseling.  If you’re a guy then I know what you’re thinking.  “Does it help me get my wife to understand that I need sex more often then NEVER?!”  Yes!  Understand, though, that it comes with other things as well.  Truly though, counseling is not saying, “My marriage sucks and I can’t fix it on my own.”  It is saying that my wife/husband and I could be better.  If you think that you have the perfect marriage, slap yourself because you’re dreaming.  If you ever think that you’re marriage doesn’t need any work, that just means that you’re blind and dumb.  Any relationship that you have could be better.  By going to counseling, you have just taken the first step to making yourself happier.

Now that your interested in being happier, let me ruin that for you.  The only way to make yourself happier, is to make your spouse happier.  Ha!  Still interested?  It’s very true.  If you want to be happier in you’re marriage, you can try two ways.  Trying to make yourself happier, or your spouse happier which in turn will make you happier.  Let’s look at the first example.

What would make you happier by your own means?  Where are you feeling neglected?  Need more sex?  Do you need to feel needed, loved, desired, like you can talk to someone?  Sex is a two person act!  Sorry guys, what you’re thinking is a climax, not sex.  Sex is an act of love between two people.  Notice the two in there?  Do you need to feel like someone cares for you?   You can’t tell someone to care about you and expect them to truly care if they aren’t receiving the same thing from you.  The same goes for the rest.  They might give it to you for a little while, but it won’t last if they aren’t receiving it from you.  That’s the same reason that you don’t feel like giving it to them.  Bottom line is, you can only take out what you’ve put in.  Have you ever heard of the “Marriage Box?”  If you put nothing into that box, you can’t take anything out.  

     Women: Look at these boxes and think which one you’d rather have.  The one that’s empty, or the one with “honey, you look amazing” or “I’m so lucky to have such an amazing women by my side” or “why don’t you take a bubble bath while I clean the house and watch the kids”?  I know tough choice.  

Men: Do the same.  Would you rather have the empty box, or the one with “Let’s have sex, right here, right now, take me to pleasure town!” or “What can I make you for dinner sweetie?” or “I think you should go get yourself an HD DLP TV with an HD DVD player”.  Wow, are we really that obsessed with letters guys?  Besides, did you even know that there was two other options after the first one?

So let’s look at the other way.  To make yourself happier, get over yourself, and serve your spouse.  Put everything you have into that box.  Try to out-serve your spouse (This also works with people who are dating, it actually starts the relationship off the right way).  If you give your spouse words of affirmation, gifts, acts of love, loving touches (non-sexual), and quality time, there is nothing that your spouse can take out of that box except for those things.  By the way, yes it is the 5 love languages.  If you haven’t read the book, start there, otherwise you may be working in vain.  It only makes sense.  It’s against the grain, but then again, societies grain is leading to divorce these days. 

So, what sounds better?  What sounds more feasible.  Do you agree?  Do you think that it’s just blowing smoke?  Is there anything else you can add to it?