Sports!!

I just don’t get it.  Why is everyone so obsessed with sports?  I have never been into it really.  I love to play baseball and football, but I have never been able to follow the sport.  I don’t know who’s who, who’s doing what, and what all the hub bub is about.  Does that make me less of a man?  Perhaps, I just have more interesting things in my life that I feel are more important.  I don’t really watch TV or watch all that many movies.  I just don’t find the value in it anymore.  I used to be hooked on watching Pinks and Overhaulin but never sports.  I don’t get it.  What’s the value in spending hours everyday reading the newspaper and watching Sportscenter to catch up on the Sports world?  Someone clue me into this.  What am I missing?

The only sport that I really watch and get into is MMA.  I love the UFC and WEC and follow it somewhat closely.  I just respect the people in there soo much.  They aren’t just fighters.  They are technicians!  They can go from almost knocked unconcious to breaking your arm in a matter of a second.  That’s incredible.

Figuring out God

I’ve been trying to figure God out.  He’s not easy.  I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to figure Him out.  His ways and idea of time are crazy.

So I’ve been thinking about my relationship and how God fits into it.  Since about 19 I’ve been trying to seek out God.  As time goes by I’ve been growing closer and closer to Him.  Just when I think I’ve got things figured out, God throws a curveball.  I don’t even believe that He throws a curveball as much as I’ve been sinning or going through the motions and not really seeing what God has been throwing me.  My life seems to go in all directions and when I look back it looks like a curveball.

Anyways, I’ve been trying to fit Him in a box and figure Him out.  I see Him working in a few ways.  Let’s take 2 examples.  The first, a little girl getting raped.  A horrible, horrible experience.  I see two individuals, one who is sinning and the other is not necessarily sinning, but we don’t know.  I see a horrible tradgic thing, but God can still use that for good.  That girl can go on and save the lives of many young girls who have gone through the same thing.  Let’s now take divorce.  Divorce is a tricky thing.  I don’t see how 2 people after God’s heart, could get a divorce.  I don’t see how years down the road, God could use that to better someones life.  You’ve already given your virginity to that person, and you’re sacred relationship to them.  It’s as if you were joined with the person at marriage, then as you get a divorce you need to remove the left portion of you’re ribcage and move on to complete someone else.  You’re mangled and not whole, but yes you can find someone else, you will never be whole though.  You’ll always be missing that part of you.  You can never get it back.  Who knows though.  Maybe that’s not how it really works, maybe God can fully and truly renew you.  I don’t think so, but God isn’t someone that I truly understand yet.  He is always surprising me with new things and new ways of teaching me valueable lessons.

I guess you couldn’t ever figure out God.  If so that would be putting Him into too small of a box.  He’s bigger than any box we could ever imagine.  I always want to chase Him and know what He has for my life, but He’ll never be understood.  I don’t even think when we get to heaven we’ll understand Him.

Who wants to help?

Here’s what I need.  I need some people to work out with me!  I would like to play tennis, go rollerblading, go swimming, workout, anything that requires physical excersize without just running.  Can’t do that.  It’s not that I need someone to motivate me, it’s just more fun when someone or some people are doing it with you.  I need to keep on keepin on and it’s hard when it’s just me doing these things.  I just need to lose about 15 more pounds and then I’m at one of my goals as far as weight goes.  I’m 255 lbs right now.  That’s right, it’s 70 lbs. down since last Summer.  Go me!  So I need to keep on goin’ before I start slacking and not working out!

WHO’S COMING WITH ME?! – Jerry Maguire

Some Artists

You know how you are really going through some emotional times and an artist comes on the radio and the words really speak to you.  Not only that, but you can feel what the artist is feeling.  They can really just cut to the core of you.  Right now it’s artists like Jason Mraz, Colbie Calliat, and now Justin Nozuka.  I remember the first time I heard his song “After Tonight” I was amazed.  He has such soul in his songs.  I know some people don’t like his “bravado” but I think that it fits him.  He does do it in every one of his songs and it does get a little old but other than that I think he’s awesome.  His heart is really in his music.  If not, then he has me fooled.  What do you think?  Do you think he’s good?  Which one do you like best?  Which one speaks to you? Comment and let me know what you think.

Hope!

Hope is a dangerous thing and yet one of the best things to have.  It can keep you going when things look impossible, and it can drag you through the trenches, tearing you apart from the inside out.

Hope is the light at the end of the tunnel.  It is the thing that keeps you going when nothing else makes sense.  It can get you through the toughest of times if you let it.  There are alot of people who think that hope is a double edge sword.  I am one of them.  I think that it can be an instrumental tool in getting you through things that you could’ve never made it through.  You know when you see movies and against all odds the hero gets up, and with everything they have left they throw the last haymaker/granade/word to change the almost inevitable outcome.  We all have this little person inside us that says, “Yes! I knew you could do it.  I would’ve done the same thing!”  On the other hand you could turn it around as well.  You’ve always seen the bad guy on his last leg, and even though he’s been beaten or shot 5 times, he still has enough energy to draw his weapon one last time.  You know what happens next.  The hero draws his piece quicker and the “bad guy” is killed.  It’s the same hope that they each had.  The last straw to make things right.

So is hope a good or a bad thing?  I guess it depends on your viewpoint.  I am a strong believer that you can change your viewpoint in the snap of a finger.  It’s easy to always see the bad in things.  That’s our nature.  It’s alot harder to see everything in a positive light.  If you look at every situation and see how it could benefit you or how you could grow from it, you will have a better outlook on life.  Your life will be more uplifting and more fun!  Isn’t that what life is about? I know, not just having fun, you need to have a purpose, but you can have a purpose and have fun fulfilling that purpose.  Lighten up everyone.  Don’t take life sooo seriously!  Do what you need to do, but enjoy the time you have here.

Bad things and Good people

Why do Bad things happen to Good people?  It’s the age old question.  Is there really a right answer?

It’s hard when the bad things are happening to you.  The verse that keeps going through my head is James 1:2-4, “2Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. ⁴Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”  It is not easy to swallow, but it comes straight from the Bible.  I’ve studied this verse before and it’s always stuck out to me.  I remember thinking of this verse many times when I lost my job, when Danielle and I were going through struggles.  I always thought of this.  I never knew I had so much “maturing” to do.  You know when you think you’re really on top of things and you have everything figured out.  That’s when the proverbial “shit hits the fan”.  I’ve thought many times about how I’ve obviously had some maturing to do.  Well, I am still a child apparently.  God is really developing perseverance in me.  It helps me to understand what he’s doing in me and why it’s important that I go through this non-sense.  I just saw a show the other day where a guy wanted to straighten a very crooked stick about a nickel in diameter.  You know how he did it?  He put it over a fire and bent it against some rocks.  He kept doing this until it straightened right out like it was designed that way.  God has to do that sometimes for us.  He has to put us in the flames and really work us over with a rock to straighten us out.  Sucks believe me, I know.  I know what God’s doing but it’s hard because I really just want to rebel and not do the “right” thing, but God keeps me just barely still in His grasp.  I think we’ve all had these times when we want to just be bad for no other reason than F*@$ IT!!  I’m in one of those times.  I want to just say “Screw everything that is right, I want to do what I know is wrong because I feel that I’ve gotten the short end of the stick!”  I know where that leads though.  It leads to temporary fun, excitement, herpes….uh, I mean hurdles.  It just leads to more hurdles that you have to overcome when you can just save the energy and do what God wants of me.  He’s always the stick in the mud!  But I guess I’ve really not answered the question.  “WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE?”

Sin!  There is never a day that we don’t sin and screw things up between God and us.  Sometimes it’s not even our sin, but someone elses.  Someone else decides to turn their back on God and someone else pays the price.  Talk about Injustice!  So how about this, why don’t we all just buck up, own our problems, own our situations and deal with them.  Bring them to God.  Say, “God, I’ve screwed up again and I need your guidance and wisdom to lead me through it!” That’s really not that hard!  It’s getting over our own pride and saying “I need help!” Don’t get me wrong people, I still need to do this.  I need to do it right now.  I don’t own alot of things that are going on.  Some I don’t even know what I did, but I know that I had a part in it. That’s ok!  Just bring it to Him and let Him help you through it!  Think of God as you’re own personal blog.  Write Him and vent the things on your heart and ask Him to help you figure out what you can do about your situation.  Realize that to fix your situation you might need to just give it to Him.

I think I’ve finally decided

So here’s the tenative plan.  My friends from my small group have invited and insisted that I go with them to just outside of Seattle for 12 days.  I’ve been looking to go traveling and I think this is exactly what I’ve been looking for.  I’ve also really been wanting to go to Colorado as well.  I’ve found the best of both worlds.

I was checking out flights on Southwest and here’s what I’ve come up with.  I can go from Phoenix to Denver from July 4th to the 10th.  Then on the 10th I’d fly from Denver to a layover in Salt Lake City and then on to Seattle where I would meet up with my friends.  Then we’d go to the camping site (I think, not exactly sure if it’s a campsite or a cabin like deal) and hang out in complete and total relaxation and peace for about 10 days, then head back from Seattle back to Phoenix.  Sounds absolutely perfect.

Now here’s the deal with the flights.  I can fly to and from Seattle to Phoenix for $253.20 rountrip.  Now, if I wanted to go to Denver then Seattle it would cost me, with the layover, $280.20.  So it would cost me an extra $27 to go to Denver for 6 days.  Wow!  I’m stoked.  I just need to check with work and make sure that is feasible and then start to really save up.  I can easily afford the flights and even some spending money, but I need to make sure that I’ll be ok after that too.  What a Godsend though.  I’ve needed this very badly and now everything is coming together again.  You remember my “coming to fruition” post.  I think it’s happening again.  Things seem to be working out very well.  Maybe a little too well.  Screw it, I’m in charge of my own fate.  I won’t let “circumstances” get in the way.

God, please protect me and my feelings.  Keep me safe and focused on You.  I need to grow closer to You and lean on You more right now.  I pray that I do this and that You’ll bless me for following You.  Amen!

Wedding relived

So I just got back from California.  I had a blast.  It was incredible to see all of my family from my mom’s side.  It’s been about 5 years or maybe more since I’ve seen all of them together.  What a great experience.  I was there for my cousin’s wedding which was the most beautiful and extravagent wedding I’ve ever been to.  It was incredible.

It was also one of the hardest things I’ve had to endure yet.  It wasn’t anything to do with the service.  It was reliving my wedding.  It absolutely broke my heart to relive the vows.  They are the true joining of 2 people and the vows of honoring God and each other through the rest of their lives.  Not only that, but when my uncle Richard was giving his daughter to Sean.  It killed me.  I saw the Love coming out of Sean.  I felt it.  It was the same Love I had for Danielle at our wedding.  I remembered the jitters, the excitement, anxiousness and the overwhelming feeling of  “this is the best day of my life”.  All of that came over me and I couldn’t help but just bawl.  I want that so bad right now.  I want to be able to re-live that experience.  I can’t though.  It’s done and over with.  I couldn’t keep my composure.  I was soo happy for them and soo frustrated with my situation.  Weddings are so sacred.

Thank God my family was there.  They really helped me get through it.  I was overjoyed for my cousin Steph and her new hubby Sean.  They are amazing people and it’s truly a blessing to know them both.  I wish you a lifetime of happiness.

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I’m in Love with Colbie Caillat

She’s amazing.  Her voice and lyrics are soothing to my soul.  Once again, lyrics that come jumping from my chest onto a video.  I know I keep saying that, but the videos that I just happen to stumble upon are what’s going through me at the time.  Danielle, I wish you could realize what I’ve realized.

Here’s the video.  Unfortuneately embedding is disabled or something like that.